It's Easy, Just Feel It In Your Big Toe (He Says)
By Lisa Dawson
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| It's easy, just drive the bus (and meet me later at mahogany ridge for one last tip). |
Growing up in a small beach town was idyllic, especially since I loved being a beach baby. Now later in life I'm suffering consequences. I'm not talking skin cancer. I'm talking about my 20 year marriage to one of the ski greats and trying to keep up. And now that our son is 12 and out skiing us both, the challenge is even greater.
One reason might be that my husband has a theory that it is trouble to teach your girlfriend (ignore former word) or wife how to ski. Better to hire someone, and since I'd rather buy snazzy new ski pants than pay an instructor, the lessons have been few. Nonetheless, I can usually wring a few tips out of Lou by asking for them on special occasions, such as Christmas or Valentine's Day. But then another problem arises: the tips themselves.
It could well be he is from Mars and I am from Venus, because his tips are so obtuse they might as well be spoken by someone from another planet. His favorite tip when I ask for help: you need to stand on your skis. Stand on my skis? What am I doing, riding with them on my head? Another: be more aggressive. What does that mean exactly? Go faster? Don't turn? Hit you with a ski pole? And of course, ski the inside edge. Is that a yoga move? Put your weight into the turn. Are you saying I look fat? Drive the bus. Thanks, that's clear. And the ever specific: don't think, just ski. Hey, that really helps me get beyond the pizza wedge. Another favorite: feel the turn in your big toe. Zen?
And there's the whole other game of skiing powder. The only tip I've ever gotten is just move like you are doing it. Doesn't he ever think of anything else?
And finally, the weird, the beyond, the paranormal. The stone monkey. Do you know what he is talking about? I don't. Maybe he said the stoned monkey. Perhaps he was the stoned monkey? Was it back in his days as a dish washer in Aspen? Does this have anything to do with the powder skiing trick he promulgates...?
But perplexity aside, I must say
I love a day out on the planks. And one of Lou's tips, "just have
fun," rings true. The best is hiking up in the early morning and
carving a big arc in the fresh groom (much to the chagrin of my backcountry
boys who shun the perfect corduroy and ski the crud to "stay dialed").
Once in a while I have moments when it really is glisse, and I don't
think except to enjoy that wonderful feeling. And on those other days
when it doesn't quite click, I'll let the boys go ahead, and try to
crack what the heck the tipster is talking about.
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