2013 Backcountry Skiing Holiday Gift List – Version One

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This post by WildSnow.com blogger  

As we were pulling together the annual WildSnow holiday gift list, we realized the same items were coming to the table: Darn Tough socks, Ski Journal, Spot Messenger, Dynafit Radicals, tickets for two to a far away chalet…

But here at WildSnow we strive to give you more. Instead of lackluster ideas, we want to inspire you to reach new heights — on mountains and in the largest robotic shipping centers on the planet.

As we rushed around getting ready for our Thanksgiving ski trip to Canada, no new ideas came. The pressure intensified like a shrieking espresso machine. Black Friday loomed.

Then this morning we stumbled out of bed. At 4:00 a.m. we rushed to the airport, only to sit on the runway for three hours waiting out the weather. As the mist cleared, so did our minds. The ideas streamed in. Thanks to SkyMall here is the 2013 WildSnow list of best gifts ever for the beloved backcountry traveler in your life.

CPAP - buy 1 and get three at 50% off.  Perfect for the mates on your next hut trip.  Secure your mask before assisting others.

CPAP user? Buy 1 and get three at 50% off. Perfect for the mates on your next hut trip. Amazingly light weight for such high tech. Secure your mask before assisting others.

Best solution for dog and cat anxiety. Can I wear one?

Best solution for dog and cat anxiety. Multiple pressure points in the Backcountry Thunder Shirt have a mystical calming effect for dogs when they get anxious, fearful, or over-excited by skiers tempting them to the chase. Lou ordered size XL.

No snow, no problem!  Zoom around town on this and get in top skimo shape.  For a limited time, SkyMall offers a special WildSnow edition premounted with Dynafit Beast.  They'll never beat you to the pow again.

No snow, no problem! Zoom around town on this disruptive technology and get in top skimo shape. For a limited time, SkyMall offers a special WildSnow edition premounted with Dynafit Beast bindings. Dynafit clip-ins means they'll never beat you to the pow again.

Expanding pet gate spreads out to fit a wide variety of skin tracks.

Expanding pet gate spreads out to fit a wide variety of skin tracks. Perfect wherever faux service dogs nip your heels.

The remote control Chinook helicopter, what size?

The remote control Chinook helicopter, what size?

CO2, scientifically proven to reduce athletic recovery time by 90%.

O2, scientifically proven to reduce athletic recovery time by 90%. Skimo racer legal doping, or bring it on your next Beglinger led hut trip so you can string those 10,000 vertical foot days together with only 4 hours recovery sleep, thus leaving more time for repairing your worn out boot liners.

Magic Panty, read customer reviews  Lordosis, delta angle, ramp angle, Magic Benefit Panty enhances ramp angle naturally.

Magic Panty, read customer reviews. Lordosis, delta angle, ramp angle, all get the magic, but your ramp angle is especially enhanced.

Grand Tiki Sculpured Table. These exotic sculptures predate Ullr.  Serve guests with Polynesian style and the resulting equatorial winds will manifest an el Nino jet stream.

Grand Tiki Sculptured Table. These exotic sculptures predate Ullr. Serve guests with Polynesian style and the resulting equatorial winds will manifest a moisture laden el Nino jet stream that will be a legend to your grandchildren.

Sturdy Log Rack, durable enough to hold one hour's wood supply.

Sturdy Log Rack, durable enough to hold one hour's wood supply at your favorite hut.

His and her Faux Telemark top.

His and her Faux Telemark tops.

Nick's secret weapon.  Create your own Vahalla.

Nick's secret weapon. Create your own Sweetgrass Vahalla video sequence, make millions.

Easily spy wildlife or canines ahead.

Easily spy wildlife or canines ahead.

Our professional copy writers are amazing. They can think up product attributes out of thin air. But they came up blank on this one. Anyone care to vie for their job and write a caption?

Our professional copy writers are amazing. They can think up product attributes out of thin air. But they came up blank on this one. Anyone care to vie for their job and write a squib?

If you can't afford the helicopter above, The Human Slingshot fits the bill.

If you can't afford the helicopter above, Human Slingshot fits the bill. Featured at the next X Games. Denali NP rangers say this has enough power to launch one Denali Clean Mountain Can from Motorcycle Hill to Kahiltna Base. Testing is ongoing. Duuuuuuuck!

A new office chair for HIS BLOGNESS has been acquired, thanks to Sky Mall!

A new office chair for HIS BLOGNESS has been acquired, thanks to Sky Mall! It was a steal at $1,250.

Comments

5 Responses to “2013 Backcountry Skiing Holiday Gift List – Version One”

  1. louis dawson November 28th, 2013 4:23 pm

    We got to Asulkan hut, nice place and there is some snow. Have a good Thanksgiving everyone and enjoy the shopping list!

  2. Dave November 28th, 2013 9:25 pm

    The squirrel sacrifice to Ullr now stands resplendent, guarding the approaches to ones favorite powder stash.

  3. michael pike November 29th, 2013 3:32 pm

    The Hut Guardian
    Protects your hut from sqirrel and rodent intrusion.

    Comes with built-in glass cleaning and antifog oils on chest hair.

    The paws make a convient hanger for your goggles.

    But wait! there’s more: Lazer-like eye probes reveal hidden stashes and goodies your hutmates have been been hiding from you.

  4. michael pike November 29th, 2013 3:41 pm

    Bu! wait, theres evn more1 Order now and we’ll include the Nutcracker.
    Spread arms out to open mouth, insert nut and pull down arms to crack even the toughest nut,

  5. michael pike December 1st, 2013 10:00 pm

    The teeth also work well as a bottle opener

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Welcome to Louis (Lou) Dawson's backcountry skiing information opinion website and e magazine. Lou's passion for the past 45 years has been alpinism, climbing, mountaineering and skiing -- along with all manner of outdoor recreation. He has authored numerous books and articles about backcountry skiing and is well known as the first person to ski down all 54 of Colorado's 14,000-foot peaks, otherwise known as the Fourteeners! Books and free back country news and information here, and tons of Randonnee rando telemark info.

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Backcountry skiing is a dangerous sport. You may be killed or severely injured if you do any form of ski mountaineering, skimo randonnee and randonnée skiing. The information and news on this website is intended only as general information. While the authors and editors of the information on this website make every effort to present useful information about ski mountaineering, due to human error the information, text and images contained within this website may be inaccurate, false, or out-of-date. By using, reading or viewing the information provided on this website, you agree to absolve the owners of Wild Snow as well as content contributors of any liability for injuries or losses incurred while using such information. Furthermore, you agree to use any of this website's information, maps, photos, or binding mounting instructions or templates at your own risk, and waive Wild Snow its owners and contributors of any liability for use of said items for backcountry skiing or any other use.

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